Snippets

It was snowing on my way to work this morning. Just flurries, nothing substantial yet. Sorry to my friends in the north who got real accumulation over the weekend. Unless you’re into snow in October, then you can keep it. I find this time of year to be a bit difficult, in that I don’t ever want to leave the house and basically just want to eat a lot and hibernate until April or so.

I’ve been up to a bit of miscellaneous nonsense lately. Barenaked Ladies played at one of our theatres earlier this month and their promoter offered staff comps (which doesn’t happen often), so Darren and I went for the nostalgia. They have a new album out, but they know what people like and played their old mega-hits too.

Kate and I trekked up to the middle of nowhere two weekends ago for Kelsey’s birthday. We got lost twice but it was worth the trip. Kels was house-sitting at this incredible place that is basically perfect except it is very far away from a Target. Quality time and foods and drinking games made for a delightful evening. Plus I ate the most delicious apple. Trust me when I say this apple was worth the mention.

Amanda threw an alter egos party at Casa Como on Saturday. The idea was dreamed up at the Stews and Brews party that Kate and Susanna had hosted earlier this year. We dig theme parties, obviously. Kate and I busted out Shawna and Donna, our inner loud Bostonian ladies, and Darren participated as my – Donna’s – Southie boyfriend John. We collectively won the ribbon for funniest costume(s?), which I think was aided by the Red Sox game that was occurring as the party happened. And now I desperately want the Sox to win the World Series.

I’ve been continuing my knitting when time allows. I made a bit of progress on Darren’s scarf this weekend. In other domestic proceedings, I re-potted my spider plant and I am concerned that it might not be appreciative. It has been fertilized and watered, so I am just keeping a close eye on it.

Speaking of plants, I acquired three air plants which arrived in the mail today. They are hanging out in a coffee cup until it’s time to go home. I actually drove in today, which is somewhat rare, so clearly it worked out perfectly and the little guys won’t have to be subjected to the cold coldness while I wait for buses.

Air plants in their temporary coffee cup home.

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.

This is a long post about money. My money, specifically.

I don’t read my horoscope regularly, but it pops up on Yahoo every day and I happened to glance at it earlier today:

You may be on solid ground right now in terms of money, but it would not hurt you to conserve a little bit more. Cut back on some of your excessive spending and get more aggressive in your savings plan — and if you don’t have a savings plan, you might want to get on that today. Ditch your credit cards for a while — they make it way too easy to spend way too much! You work too hard for every penny to let even one of them slip out of your fingers without a fight.

It’s an amusing coincidence, because just this morning we went to the bank to take care of some business. Business involving paying off credit cards and getting pre-approved for an auto loan.

We actually took out a loan to consolidate our debt. Actually I took it out, because I have a good credit score but Darren has no credit at all, so the interest rate is better without him. Anyway, the debt isn’t terribly high, but the interest rates on the cards are ridiculous. Consolidating them onto a loan with less than half the interest rate, plus a smaller monthly minimum payment, is going to save us an absurd amount of money in the long run- especially since we’ll be able to make payments much higher than the minimum. Once the payments go through to the card companies we are straight-up closing those credit accounts. SO OVER IT. Incidentally, paying off the CCs is on my 30 by 30 list. Nice.

As far as the car thing goes, we’ll see what happens. We’ve set a maximum allowance for a purchase price but I’m aiming to spend well under that. I obviously don’t want to take on more debt when we’re trying to get rid of it, but actually with everything else we’re doing, plus having payed off a couple loans this summer (two student loans left to go! One of them is 15 years away from repayment though) we’re not going to be paying any more in bills than we do now. Likely even less, depending on what we end up paying for le car. Plus our stupid old van eats gas like crazy, so saving money with a more fuel-efficient vehicle, which of course is what we’re looking for, is a big win. Andplusalso it’ll be a joint loan so Darren can finally build some friggin’ credit.

So that’s that. We’re also doing a lot of non-spending of extra money in general. I mean we spent plenty on vacation because of course we did, we saved for it for months, but now that’s over. Less dining out, less nights at the bar, less unnecessary shopping. Less Caribou, DARREN. More saving. That’s the goal. We want to go on more vacations, and maybe buy a house someday, so we’re making some choices now that will lead to fun things in the future. The downside is it sometimes affects how I kick it with buddies, but we’re all pretty excellent at making our own fun. Hello, toga party tonight?

I’m kind of excited about this, actually.

This is the part where I totally plug our new bank. We recently left Wells Fargo and joined Affinity Plus, a credit union based in Minnesota. It’s a non-profit, and everything is wonderfully straightforward. I researched a lot of CUs for a pretty long time before I made the choice (I wear the pants in the family, I guess? Everything was thoroughly discussed but the legwork was all me) Their employees are trained in every area of the business which has been so helpful. They want their customers to succeed and that has been very clear to me in every interaction I’ve had with them. Plus there are so many little things that are awesome. Participation rewards, for example. plus they have a program called Stash Your Cash, where your debit card purchases are rounded up to the nearest dollar, and the extra amount is deposited into your savings account. We’ve only been with them about a month, but it’s been a very good month. I’d recommend them to anyone. Bonus: the fellow we worked with today noticed Darren’s extensive customer service background and let him know that Affinity Plus is hiring like crazy, and said to use him as a reference if he was interested. He even gave some interview tips. Cool!

All this to say that my horoscope today was bizarrely accurate. Well played.

Of all the shit happening in the world right now, it’s those poor, dead firefighters in Arizona that render me damn near catatonic when I pause for a minute and let myself think about anything.

Human rights are being violated left and right, but this random, horrifying act of nature is happening and these guys could only zip up in their shelters and hope to survive. I’m haunted by the idea of them laying on the ground in their bright green cocoons, waiting.

I can’t stop thinking about it.

Maybe I’m being dramatic. Maybe it’s just that kid of day? Maybe a good movie and a drink will help.

If I’m gonna jump off the cliff, and you’re gonna get pushed off the cliff, why don’t we hold hands on the way down?

Daren’s new job is in construction. Mostly cleaning up finished sites, but he’s done some hole digging and drywall hanging and such as well. He’s bee doing it for a week and he has to have lost at least five pounds already. His pajama pants – pajama pants! – are hanging off his hips. His forearms are rock solid. The work is hard and the pay isn’t great yet, but clearly there are benefits.

He has to be at work at 6:15 so the alarm goes off at 5. This means that I’m up at 5 too. I usually (or used to, I guess) get up at 6 and dang, I miss that extra hour. But the animals have not so far allowed me to go back to sleep. That paired with the Devil Cat being evil in the middle of the night means that I did not sleep much at all this week. Regardless, I was up until 3:30 am baking. I had been watching documentaries on Netflix about how our health is affected by our food and somehow cookies and cupcakes were my response: oatmeal raisin cookies because Darren loves them, and ginger lemon cupcakes because I have some sort of ginger obsession. They’re not gingery enough even though I added extra, but the lemon glaze I put on top is pretty stellar.

This in spite of the fact that the documentary about veganism (Vegucated) was almost enough to convince me to eat tofu and fake eggs. Almost. I’d recommend the others, though: Fat, Sick, & Nearly Dead and Hungry for Change.

Today I slept until after noon.

I’m going to Northern Spark tonight with some pals, and that just reminded me I should charge my camera. I suspect/have been told that it’s going to be super cool. Let’s hope it doesn’t rain too terribly, I don’t want to have to carry an umbrella all night but maybe I’ll have to. I suppose that’s not a huge price to pay in exchange for an awesome time. Sadly I have to miss out on the sweet 40s themed dance that my aforementioned pals are attending beforehand. We’re still under austerity measures until Darren starts getting paid. Fortunately that is very soon.

Anyway, I’m in the Mark Harmon episodes of The West Wing, so clearly I have pressing matters to attend to.

quickly:

That was easier than expected. Darren had an interview today and was hired on the spot. He starts Monday. Meanwhile, I reapplied at Macy’s and also interviewed today. We’ll see what happens with that. With Darren working I don’t need a second job, but the extra cash will be useful.

We celebrated modestly, with a trip to Chipotle.

I had sort of a stupid day at work today, so the good news was even more welcome. That said, I still think turning in early is something I’ll be doing tonight.

gone quiet

I slept for 12 hours last night. Well, it was probably closer to 11, because I woke up around 8 to check for baby updates on Facebook and then read for a bit. Heather and Aaron’s baby boy was born this morning, right as the sun was rising. What a perfect time of day to be born.

I got out of bed at 1. Walked Enli, made some lunch, cleaned the kitchen floor, and parked in front of Netflix. Arrested Development, followed by a couple angsty dramedys about youth. 10:45 pm, I found myself standing over the kitchen table, eating brownies out of the pan.

What kind of day has it been.

I’m being dramatic because things are in flux and I don’t function well when that happens. Darren’s job ended suddenly last week so we’re scrambling. Of course this would happen right after we book a non-refundable vacation. Oh, we’re still going, but whether or not we have extra money to spend on fun while we’re there depends on either unemployment coming through or, ideally, a new job for him. Less ideally, a second job for me. Should’ve stayed at Macy’s a little longer, it seems. He has an informal interview thing on Tuesday, so cross your crossables.

I got this stripey Hefner-esque pajama top from Morgan at a clothing swap last Friday and I’ve been living in it ever since. I’d wear it to work if I could.

I keep writing and deleting more whiny sentences. I really hope things start improving.

Seems like a good time for some tea.

 

my photons.

After twenty-one years I may have run out of words. Instead, I’m going to post this thing I found on Facebook the other day. You may have seen it, or maybe not. I think it’s pretty great.

You want a physicist to speak at your funeral. You want the physicist to talk to your grieving family about the conservation of energy, so they will understand that your energy has not died. You want the physicist to remind your sobbing mother about the first law of thermodynamics; that no energy gets created in the universe, and none is destroyed. You want your mother to know that all your energy, every vibration, every Btu of heat, every wave of every particle that was her beloved child remains with her in this world. You want the physicist to tell your weeping father that amid energies of the cosmos, you gave as good as you got.

And at one point you’d hope that the physicist would step down from the pulpit and walk to your brokenhearted spouse there in the pew and tell him that all the photons that ever bounced off your face, all the particles whose paths were interrupted by your smile, by the touch of your hair, hundreds of trillions of particles, have raced off like children, their ways forever changed by you. And as your widow rocks in the arms of a loving family, may the physicist let her know that all the photons that bounced from you were gathered in the particle detectors that are her eyes, that those photons created within her constellations of electromagnetically charged neurons whose energy will go on forever.

And the physicist will remind the congregation of how much of all our energy is given off as heat. There may be a few fanning themselves with their programs as he says it. And he will tell them that the warmth that flowed through you in life is still here, still part of all that we are, even as we who mourn continue the heat of our own lives.

And you’ll want the physicist to explain to those who loved you that they need not have faith; indeed, they should not have faith. Let them know that they can measure, that scientists have measured precisely the conservation of energy and found it accurate, verifiable and consistent across space and time. You can hope your family will examine the evidence and satisfy themselves that the science is sound and that they’ll be comforted to know your energy’s still around. According to the law of the conservation of energy, not a bit of you is gone; you’re just less orderly. Amen.

-Aaron Freeman.

This post is long and super whiny.

Yesterday was kind of… weak. After a couple weird things and several very little stupid things all came to pass, I was exhausted by the end of it.

Some random dude walked into the office yesterday and went off on me when I told him I didn’t keep business cards at the front desk. I mean, “fuck you, you’re worthless, you guys should close,” etc. He also let me know that he was going to tell me about someone he once met, but I wasn’t worth telling. Um, okay? It was a bizarre reaction, but fortunately brief. I did call building security when he left though, because they’re right down the hall and he went in their direction so I figured they should know dude was a nutter.

Then some shit went down on Facebook. Darren’s uncle did remove the comment and said he was sorry, he was just teasing Darren and didn’t mean to be offensive. I told him he should have found a better way to do it, rather than making a sexist comment, and that a grown man should know better. I thought that anyone who came across the thread after the comment had been deleted ought to know that what he said was, in fact, awful. He apologized again, and I am leaving it alone. I wasn’t a huge fan of the dude in the first place, but I let Darren know last night that I have no desire to interact with or be in the presence of the man in the future. I don’t need that bullshit.

Now I’ll take a break from the negative and talk about how I accomplished item #4 on my 30 by 30 list: take myself on a date. It was inadvertent: Kate was unavailable, Darren decided against attending (I knew he would), and Rebekah decided not to skip choir. By that time, it was after 5pm and I was on my own.

So I went to dinner and a show. My solo dinner at Rock Bottom was delicious, but a little boring. I sat at the bar, watched a little TV, played with my phone a bit, talked to the bartender on occasion, and enjoyed the hell out of my food. Good enough.

Mary Poppins began its week-long run at the Orpheum last night and of course I had to go. It was delightful as usual, but again I missed having someone to share it with. Especially at intermission when I was along in my row and was like… welp. I wish the kids behind me would shut up. But the show was lovely. Bert did the dance-on-the-proscenium thing for Step in Time, which is arguably the best number in the show. I mean, I started feeling a little unwell and considered leaving during intermission, but I didn’t want to miss friggin’ Step in Time. I love it so.

Anyway, mission accomplished. Dinner was awesome and the show was too, but I would have rather had company. Ah, well.

So, that was a little respite in the ridiculousness of the day. I did develop a headache and vague nausea during the show that lasted for the rest of my night, but I powered through. Even after one of the noisy, seat-kicking children behind me elbowed me in the back of my damn head. Parents, if your kids can’t sit through a 160 minute event, don’t take them.

Then it took 25 minutes to get out of the parking garage. I was expecting to wait; I didn’t plan on waiting that long. Ten of those minutes were spent in the exit line not moving at all. WTF. Once I was free of that hell, I was off to Taco fucking Bell because Darren had been jonesing for tacos all day and never managed to get them. So I told him I’d pick some up for him, horrible though I think Taco Bell is. And, at 11:30 pm, there was a ridiculous line at the drive through. Of course there was. Youths!

Once I made it through and headed home, I got stuck at a devil stoplight. The walk signal would change to the flashing hand, but then go back to a walk signal. It happened four times before I just hung a right and went around the damn block.

Then I was halfway though showering and the water went completely cold. One leg was shaved, the other was not.

In the end, I figured at least I was effing alive and well and sometimes we just have shitty days. I decided to set my alarm ahead an extra hour and a half because sleep makes things better.

Enli woke me up an hour before my alarm went off.

But I get cupcakes today, so hope is not lost.

Trying to reach infinity

I’m bored. Nothing is happening; the most exciting thing about this week so far is the new Keurig we purchased at work. Seems like a good time for a little check-in on the 30 by 30, eh? Warning: I gotta tell ya, this is not a very interesting post. Unless you’re into beauty products, I guess.

I’ve progressed nicely on #2, getting into better shape. I lost something like 17 pounds, and some of my muscles are way more defined. I can see abs! Or one, at least. maybe two. Plus biceps and stuff. Cool.

#3 is skincare stuff. I found a face wash I lurve, so that’s nice. Honestly if I could afford to buy everything from Origins I would, because I’ve only ever loved their products, but most of them are out of my price range. Someday.

#4, take myself on a date… ideas are churning. I mentioned this in a previous post.

#10, lipstick. I’ve been wearing two colors from Revlon: Blushing Nude, which is not at all nude, it’s definitely more… burgundy? and Rose & Shine, which is pretty similar to my actual lip color but it makes them nice and shiny, which I suspect is the purpose. I like both of them quite a bit, but now I’ve got my eye on a couple coral options.

And that is all. Clearly I have some work to do– there are more interesting things on that list, I promise, and when I get to those I will see if I can’t make the posts about them super awesome.

Bonus cat photo (I need to get more dog pictures up in here). The only way to keep Winston out of my way in the morning is to turn on the bathtub faucet.

companionable as solitude

One of the items on my 30 by 30 list is to take myself on a date. When I was coming up with the list, that particular idea just sounded like it might be a good thing to do.

I’m realizing lately that it might really be something I need to do.

Maybe I’ve always been this way and haven’t noticed, or maybe it’s just happening as I get older, but I don’t like doing things alone. Generally I enjoy solitude- I go shopping by myself all the time, or I’ll grab a quick meal alone (longer meals are another story), or pretty much anything that doesn’t involve human interaction. But I don’t do events solo.

• In 2009 I saw Sufjan Stevens play at the 400 Bar. I only went alone because tickets sold out so fast and no one else I know who wanted to go managed to get any. Clearly I should have bought two.
• A couple months ago I had dinner by myself because I had an hour to kill. I sat at the bar, had a cheeseburger, and got a little drunk. It was slightly awkward but undeniably delicious.
• I have seen exactly two movies by myself: Superbad and Sweeney Todd. Movies are easy.

And… that’s it. Four instances in my adult life where I went and just hung out with myself.

I could also get into a whole mess about how uneasy I feel in groups and how I tend to use my husband as some sort of shield from human interaction, but that… that is another post altogether. I mean, as long as I either know everyone or don’t have to talk to anyone I’m fine. Uhhh… maybe I need to see someone about this problem.

So anyway, I’d like to feel more comfortable with the idea of being alone someplace other than at home. Alone, and not trying to shut out the world with sunglasses and headphones (which doesn’t work, by the way).  Solution: take myself on a date. More than once, in theory, but ya gotta start somewhere. I was going to go to dinner and then see Flashdance the Musical last night but responsibilities got in the way, so I ended up just writing about it instead. Sometime in the next few weeks or months I’ll plot something brilliant and report back.